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What Did You Get Suspended For?

Put a Twinkie on my classmates chair 

I lit a fireball in chemistry my junior year and burned off my lab partner’s eyebrows

I was suspended for 2 days in 8th grade for calling the vice principal a bastard

I got suspended for driving my car with someone on the hood

I was once suspended from school for pulling the fire alarm in order to get out of taking an exam

Flushed a girls gym shorts down the toilet

I got a detention for teaching my classmates what horny meant in 3rd grade

I answered my teachers singles wanted ad

Got suspended from school for a week because I stole poptarts from the school cafeteria

For singing sugar sugar by the archie’s in the hallway on my way to the locker room after gym class… they told me I was disrupting the other classes even though the only other class on the floor was music class 

We were watching a marshmallow expand in the microwave in science class and someone yelled it’s gonna blow and started a stampede that trampled a girl on crutches – they said it was me and I got an in school suspension 

6th grade flipped off my chorus teacher behind my music and the piano teacher saw and told (at a private school) had to clean the elementary bathrooms with a toothbrush 

I got suspended because when my 8th grade math teacher asked me what I would do with my life if I didn’t get good grades, I replied become an 8th grade math teacher like you

Good morning guys I was once suspended from high school for stealing typing books from high school lockers and reselling them to the bookstore 

We crushed up Alka Seltzers and put it in the teacher’s sugar bowl

I was given 5 days out for putting ipecac syrup in a bottle of Pepsi and allowing it to be “stolen” by another student. Most anticipated moment in band history waiting for the effects to kick in

I was suspended because I helped put 100 pounds of instant jello in the swimming pool

I wasn’t suspended but got a weeks worth of detention for throwing my teachers keys on the roof Of the school. She gave them to me to unlock the door after gym class 


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