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I Blame My Parents For…

I blame my parents for raising me in a cult 

My stuffed bear obsession 

My OCD about my teeth 

I blame my mom for never wearing a seat belt 

My long skinny toes 

My sister and 2/5 grandchildren have shopping problems “I want it I’ll get it”

I blame my parents that when I go out to eat I feel like I need to eat my entire meal otherwise the chef will think I didn’t like their cooking  

I blame my parents for having no childhood friends because of their strict rules, I felt like I was prisoned

Male pattern baldness 

As I’m “guilting” my kids into doing things. They hate it but I just blame my parents!

I blame my parents for my toys habit: I have a boat, kayaks, motorcycles, side by side, 5th wheel camper. He/She Who dies with the most toys, Wins! 😉

I blame my parents for my sarcasm I can’t stop

For my weird pinky toe (had an extra toe and had it removed, but think it’s the wrong one)

Making me anti social. They didn’t allow me to get involved in group sports or activities

I blame my father for me being a jackass. He was a (proudly) self-proclaimed “King of the Assholes”…and I can’t seem to shake off his crap

I blame my family for escaping Vietnam just to move to Oklahoma, where there was ABSOLUTELY nothing to do and no beaches. Also, Bible Belt ugh. Oh and not to mention higher exchange rates. But still thankful they fled to give me a better life

Winner: I blame my parents for being promiscuous

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