I’m re-gifting about 75% of the gifts I received from last year so I don’t have to go shopping!
Hooking up with a guy named Grimur
All year I TOOK a penny and never LEFT a penny
I took my sons’ candy from Halloween and blamed my husband for taking it.
Broke up with my fiancé in march, eloped with someone else in April, now we have a baby due in July!
I accidentally stumbled upon my Christmas present. It’s a pair earrings and I tried them on
Spent WAY too much at the casino this year… my husband doesn’t know but Santa does. And that scares me
My Husband and I split the bills. Which means he’s been paying for 1/2 of his own gifts.
I’m on the naughty list because when I found out my husband was cheating on me I poured Nair into his Head and shoulders shampoo. And then I slowly replaced his viagra with estrogen pills. And then I cut holes in the crotch seam of every pair of his work dress pants
What landed me on the naughty list? I fornicated with an elf. And by elf I mean a 3’2 woman in a elf costume
I had a baby with my “friend with benefits”